Monday, April 20, 2009

again

My oh my, I'm very remiss in my postings. I've been very busy creating websites (I'm actually getting something accomplished!), but here are a few more one-liners for your amusement.

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

How did a fool and his money get together?

How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

What's another word for thesaurus?

What do they use to ship styrofoam?

Does fuzzy logic tickle?

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

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